The first time I ever heard of The Desiderata was way back in the seventies, during my first year in the Royal Air Force. I joined as an apprentice at RAF Hereford straight from school at the age of fifteen and a half. There was a hit single version, voiced by an American DJ, Les Crane. I found the song to be quite haunting, but the words didn't really have much of an impact...
Anyway, a couple of years later, I had my first serious relationship with a girl called Irene. We had been seeing each other at work at RAF Cranwell, and we were set up as a "blind date" by our colleagues! We hit it off immediately, and one day the time came for me to meet her mother (gulp!). I was thinking of something I could do to show I was a decent sort of bloke, and wondered how I could impress her. Suddenly, the song Desiderata came into my head, and decided to type out the words (painstakingly playing back the song, one line at a time) and give it to her as a gift. Well, it worked and she appreciated the gesture!
So, time took its course and after a couple of years, we split up; we still saw each other at work though, and for me it was a huge loss. In the White Cranes Club (the NAAFI recreation building), there was a disco held every Thursday evening. I decided to go along, still very upset with our separation and very down (in fact I had been prescribed valium and, for some reason, iron tablets). I was devastated to see her with another boy and, as crazy as it sounds in hindsight - I got totally drunk, went back to my room, and took all the tablets....
I remember the following morning, I was viewing myself from the ceiling, and remembered thinking why there was birdseed on top of my locker. At that point my boss, Sergeant Cutler came through the door, cigarette in hand. He strolled over to where I was lying, thinking that I'd overslept (a regular event for me at the time), strolled over to where I lay and tried to rouse me. He then realised there was something wrong, disappeared and called for an ambulance....
I recall almost nothing of the journey, except, for some reason some words gently, lovingly going through my mind in very very slow motion it seemed. I was surrounded by an incredible calmness, a "nothingness" if I were to try and describe it, (which I have experienced since during times of danger) and the words "You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars, you have a right to be here..." being said kindly, patiently and lovingly over and over again in my head. Those present must have noted this down, because after a few days, when I recovered, I was sent to see a military shrink who asked me why I kept repeating this phrase. I couldn't tell him the answer at the time, and it was only when I heard the song again after being discharged from RAF Nocton Hall Hospital that I remembered. Oh, and by the way... I checked the top of my locker and yes, there was birdseed there!
This experience of attempted suicide at the age of seventeen, and discovering the vastness of the cosmos in which we live, plus the words from The Desiderata changed my life forever, and my view of why were are here (more of that in later posts)...
The Desiderata sent me on a journey of personal, spiritual discovery. I have spent hours and hours in what can only be described as voluntary solitary confinement, pondering, reasoning, formulating my ideas and beliefs. With them come no huge volumes of work (although I have read some amazing books, and had conversations with equally astounding people), no religious boundaries and barriers; just a very simple account of why we are here, and where we go to when we die. I am so excited by this, that I would like to share it all with as many people as I can. However, I will do it one step at a time, just as I did with my personal learning process. Each post on this blog will be just one more step along the path to the PURE LOVE AND LIGHT that powers the existence of all that is...
It is my genuine wish that you will walk with me along this path of experience and enlightenment, hand in hand. I would love to have your company and share our thoughts and beliefs, and most of all, your friendship; there are deep dark valleys on our journey, tall, cold and lonely mountains to climb, moments of sunshine, rain and dangerous creatures... but the destination is more powerful than anything in our material cosmos... the spiritual realm is our destination; a place where love and peace are realities, and we can all exist happy ever after.
Pause For Thought:
1. What life-changing experiences have shaped your future?
2. Have you ever experienced an out of body experience?
3. If so, what did you see, and where did you go?
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